Piers Morgan Wants White Girls to Say “N*gga”
Here are a few things they should say instead
His column started out with exactly what you would expect from Piers Morgan :
An outdated DAD fact.
Yes, Piers. Kanye West had a song in which he used the word “nigga.” But that song came out awhile ago. The word “nigga” however, did not. As a rule, Black people don’t use the term “nigga” because it’s mentioned in rap music. We say it because it’s rewritten context is representative of our culture. Personally, I have a problem with anyone whose ancestors weren’t brought here on slave ships saying this word in America. Black, white —whatever. This word belongs to those of us who have no traceable culture. And white people should not say it, ever.
But I will help you out here. For Piers and all the other white people who seem to need more words, here are a few things you can say instead of “nigga.”
1. “My bad”
Since it’s customary in times like these for white celebrities to issue a “statement of apology,” how about we just get the big one out of the way?
Apologize for all the happenings between slavery and this current unhinged police state we exist in today.
And don’t just say it with a smile—say it with cash. Common courtesy would tell you that when you’ve wronged people, you should take responsibility for your wrongs before asking them if you can use the racial slur that bookends their oppression.
2. “Nazis, stand down”
Call off your people, man.
I don’t see enough anti-white-supremacist community activists trying to turn over the hearts of these maniacs that think running protesters over with their cars is an act of patriotism. Instead of longing for the exotic taste of “nigga” on your lips, try warming up to the idea of stopping these alt-right guys who are making you look bad.
3. “I Accept My Whiteness”
Here’s an idea: make up your own racial slur and exchange it amongst yourselves. And while you’re at it, accept your lips, cheek bones, hips, ass, hair and skin tone.
Just be white and let that be enough.
Stop professing faux-diversity at your corporate job, when we all know it’s just another form of whitewashing. Stop making jokes about how dorky all these over-privileged white guys are — it’s a backwards humble brag and no one is fooled by it.
You don’t have to always conquer everything shiny. Just sit in the white seat and be ok with you.
4. “Black Lives Matter”
Just say it. It’s Black as hell, controversial and it will probably piss off other white people. Say it at cops, or at work so people think you're edgy. You can even say it while you dance to a rap song.
Or fine, go for it. Maybe your black friends will think it’s cool or funny. Or maybe you’ll get mistaken for a Nazi and get punched on some street corner. I guess if you’re so hard up to live a TV-version of “thug life,” a punch in the face is exactly what you’re hankering for.
What’s the word “nigga” worth to you though?
If we let all the white people say “nigga,” what do we get in exchange? Higher pay at work? Those 40 acres? That mule?
Yeah, that's what I thought.
For the record. We’re not crying over Piers Morgan’s statement. He’s a joke. One of those stale go-to jokes people use during awkward moments in elevators or waiting rooms. But this is a topic that comes up every so often and when it does it always sparks debate about who owns the word “nigga.”
The answer is: No one.
If white people weren’t so obsessed with ownership all the time — maybe slavery would have never happened and rent in the hood wouldn’t be skyrocketing.
We use the word (some of us) and we say it better. It sounds better coming from our mouths.
Sorry. That’s it.